Original post: February 12, 2018

I looked up recipes online and found that milk is a thing. Apparenty it’s possible to get milk at the first village you’re supposed to go to when off the Plateau (which, if you remember, I didn’t.)

OK, let’s go get some milk!

I teleport over to the nearest shrine, which isn’t so near, but not so far either. This is high enough up that I paraglide off towards the village, then climb about on some rocks a bit and am close to the villag..

Wait, why is the “There is a shrine nearby” noise going off?

OK, well, it’d be good to have a closer shrine to this place for teleportation reasons! Plus SQUIRREL, a shrine for more stamina!!!

So I hunt around and find the shrine, step into it…

It’s the shrine that teaches me how to fight.

I mean, I’ve been running around the wilderness trying to figure out how to fight, occasionally finding something new, but mostly running from monsters for how long now?

I found the shrine that teaches me how to fight.

OK, well, OK. At least this means now I get an easy quarter-stamina.

Once I’m done with my newfound fighting skills, I head into the village to get that milk… and find the dude who tells me to find the shrine to learn how to fight.

I never did get that milk.

The worst chef ever

Original date: February 8, 2018

So, y’all who know me probably know that my culinary skills are not the best. Possibly even the worst. OK.

So, in Zelda, you can cook things. I figure this is digital cooking, right? This means I should have a much easier time of picking up this skill. I learn how to hunt, and shoot down many a wolf and bird, pick up their meat, dutifully pick herbs and mushrooms from various places along the way. Great.

Now all I gotta do is combine them, right?

So I do my first cooking back when I was still on the plateau. There’s the cooking song that plays…. and I get “wah wah”, the sound of disappointment. My food is … not really edible but eat it anyway I am told. OK, well, it restores health so I do.

I work at this some more, and … I get a couple of dishes under my belt! Steamed meat and meat skewers! Great! This is wonderful, it’s .. at least edible!

So I work on collecting more herbs, rock salt, different kinds of meat.. hey, I just caught a fish!

I go back to the cooking dish. I get…

Steamed meat and meat skewers.

Uhm, OK.

Alright, so I wander around a lot more (btw, you may notice that a lot of what I do seems to be wandering around aimlessly in the wilderness). Hey, look, that’s a large beast! Is it… an elk? I shoot it down. PRIME MEAT it tells me! WOW! WONDER WHAT THIS WILL MAKE???

Steamed meat and meat skewers.

Hey, look, a snail!

Steamed meat and meat skewers.

OK, how about if I JUST toss in prime meat with 1 herb?

Steamed meat and meat skewers.


So, apparently my culinary skills extend from my real life into my virtual one.

A sad post

Original date: February 1, 2018

(CW: this one is sad.)

I found another horse, it was all cream colored and pretty! I easily strode up to her and mounted, then as she tried to buck me off, I charmed her in one try. Great!

Except that while she was bucking around, we slid down a cliff. And slid. And slid. And ended up next to a lake at the bottom of the cliff.

OK, horses can swim, right? Except, apparently not in the land of Zelda. OK, let’s try to climb back up! Not gonna have that. OK, how about walking along the edge of the lake beside the cliff… but apparently the cliff was too steep.

I spent an hour trying to unwedge this digital horse from where she had gotten herself stuck (at this point I decided it was a she mostly because the more I related to her, the more I personified her as me.) I tried everything several times over. Finally, I had to climb out of there in futility.

I looked back over the cliff, and there she was, just standing there stuck against the lake. Not even moving anymore.

With a heavy heart, I walked away. Not being able to bear it, I decided to teleport back to the nearest stable and run back, just to clear the cache of the server.

I looked over the cliff, she was not there. But her herd was close by still… without her in it.

Fluffy shrine tour

Original date: January 26, 2018

So, uh, my rehearsals are becoming plentiful and late, and my play-time is becoming less so. Expect less posts on this for a bit.

That being said, my bedtime story last night was “Link visits shrines.” In this story, Link visits the shrines. He doesn’t solve them, just visits, then finds another.

It’s mostly a fluff piece story, lots of pretty landscapes, not much content.